Are you good enough to make Sam's Choice?

Let’s say you’ve got some awesome handmade product or clever new invention and you’ve been trying to figure out which Brooklyn craft market is the best place to introduce it. That’s a lot of work, right? Wouldn’t it be better to skip that whole process of finding a local fanbase and go right to the hyperglobalmegacorp level? Mega retailer Walmart (currently the only thing still more controversial here than “shit ____ say” videos) is offering to give your product the American Idol treatment with its “Get on the Shelf” online campaign. The top three most popular things will be sold through its website, and the grand prize winner gets carried in physical stores. Perhaps you’re thinking, “but Tim, if I win, does that mean I’ll be staying up all night making batch after batch of home-brewed salsa to meet Walmart’s demand like some sort of artisanal sweatshop?” No! They’ll give you help scaling up production, which means you can ship that crap off to China and watch the fat profits of a hyperglobal economy roll in! Last day to enter is Feb. 22.

The groovy retro Metropolitan pool. Photo courtesy of Nikyatu Jitsu blog.

Thanks to our Twitter homies @brooklynmamas for this tip. Today at noon, the NYC Parks and Recreation department is opening up its online lottery for FREE swimming lessons for adults and kids 18 months and up. Not sure exactly how it works, but we’re thinking that it’s like a Gilt sale that blinks on magically at noon. Here is the link to registration info for the three Brooklyn pools  (they’re in Williamsburg, Brownsville and, er, Crown Heights?) Online registration is open through Wednesday, Jan. 25.

If you're feeling elfless, here's help. Photo by Rachel Eve Stein.

This post is for the Brokesters out there who have found themselves talking about their tumultuous childhood to a Trader Joe’s employee, trying to get a diagnosis from a psych major at a house party, or calling a suicide helpline to talk about relationship issues. It is hard to get mental health services when you’re without insurance, and hardest to get help without poppin’ prescribed pills. This post is about finding the elusive drug-less help for your problems in unexpected ways when you have no mental health coverage on insurance, or no insurance at all, and you’re too broke for even the lowest end of the therapist’s sliding fee scale.

Research Studies

I know what you’re thinking: blood tests and mystery drugs and questionable funding sources. However, there are many studies that do not require drugs, and may not necessarily involve traditional therapy. New York University (NYU) psychology graduate students recruit the general public to participate in PAID studies that range from topics such as interactions with new friends to decision making. If you have or may have ADHD, check out available studies at their Adult AHDH Program. Columbia Psychiatry has even more studies. All are free to participate in and only some of them pay. Many do require medication as part of the study. They have a separate Trauma and PTSD Center and Substance Treatment and Research Service (STARS), which both focus on therapy rather than medication.

Support Groups

They’re not just for alcoholics! Check out the weekly Mood Disorders Support Group (MDSG). They also offer a monthly pay-what-you-wish lecture series about mental health topics such as treatment, managing stress and anxiety, and developing better sleep habits. The National Alliance on Mental Health New York City (NAMI-NYC Metro) has monthly support groups that specialize in different disorders and types of support. Yes, Brokesters, there is a Job Talk group!

Actually Affordable Sliding Scales

 Most therapists’ sliding scale fees are ridiculous; $50 a week is not affordable! However, Kings County Hospital Center’s Behavioral Health Center offers therapy on a sliding scale from $15-20 a session. Keep in mind this is all subject to your financial situation, so call 718-245-2727 for more information on required paperwork. The South Beach Psychiatric Center is based out of Staten Island, but they have several locations in Brooklyn. The representative I spoke to said that they do not turn anyone away, meaning that fees start at FREE! If you’re looking for a more intensive program, the Columbia Center for Psychoanalytic Training and Research has a program where you visit a licensed psychiatrist or psychologist four times a week at a sliding scale, after filling out an application ($25 fee, but it could be work it).

Francisco Ramirez

This man gets a category all to himself. Mr. Ramirez is an accredited public health professional (he’s got an MPH) who gives FREE advice on sex, love, and dating to passerby in the parks of our fair city. He’s appeared in segments on MTV and does trainings all over the world, but still finds the time to sit in Union Square and give you twenty minutes of his time. Check out his Twitter feed for location updates.

Follow Rachel on Twitter: @RachelEveStein.

Titus Andronicus at Death By Audio. They ain't done so bad. Photo via Flickr's Ryan Dombal.

“Indie band success” might sound to you like “gainfully employed journalism major,” but people smarter than we in this area say apparently there is a way to make fat stacks while staying true to your DIY roots. The L Magazine published a huge feature this week of 101 secrets to indie rock success, with tips culled from the three layers of the power sandwich:  The Labels, The Experts (publicists, venue owners, mangers) and Us (aka the music media). It gives you a guide to tactics that annoy (Don’t call it a 7″ when it’s digital!), tricks to get noticed, like how to draft a booking email, and even how to act on stage. For even more tips, check Caroline’s post on how to get big-time buzz for your band.

Become a bone master (tee hee). Photo via Flickr Joe White.

You wake up and every day is the same. You feel like you’re stuck in a rut. It’s time for changes in your life. Did you know that science is all the rage these days, since nerds run the world now? The American Museum of Natural History would be happy to help you explore it, with its Master of Arts in Teaching program, that you can attend for free! Spend the 15-month program working with actual scientists at the museum to learn how to best teach school kids about geology, life sciences and dinosaurs. This is no fly-by-night diploma mill: the program includes a $30,000 stipend, health benefits and two years of professional mentoring and development. The only catch is that you have to commit to  four years teaching in a high-needs public school, which could be anywhere in the state. Suddenly, I wish I didn’t fail the New York State Physics Regents.

Via Gothamist.

Or you could always buy this thing on eBay for $18,500.

Maybe you’ve been enjoying the era of all-you-can-pirate music and how plugged in to the culture it makes you feel. Problem is, now you’re running out of hard drive space and you just know everyone’s going to be talking about how bad Lana Del Rey’s debut album really is when it comes out in two weeks. The Internet, as usual, can fix your problem with its variety of big-music sanctioned streaming sites, which have popped up like mushrooms now that all those labels are getting a cut of the action. Which one is the best? We compared free and paid plans at Spotify, Grooveshark, Pandora, Rdio and Rhapsody. Read on to find out which one wins.

SPOTIFY
Three plans: Spotify Free (Free. Duh), Spotify Unlimited ($4.99/month) and Spotify Premium ($9.99/month)

The music service on everyone’s lips and Facebook news feeds, Spotify has an interface that will be familiar to any iTunes user, which is everyone on Earth but the ten militant Winamp holdouts. Stay strong boys. Spotify boasts “millions” of songs that would take you 80 years of non-stop listening to get through. It would take even longer if you choose the free version and put up with the occasional ad and the 10 hour per month limit. Spotify Unlimited removes the ads and listening limits, Premium gives you access to Spotify’s mobile app and the ability to stream it through a variety of expensive home entertainment items like Sonos and Boxee.

PROS:  Free service isn’t just meant as a pipeline to shunt you over to paid service. The addition of Apps (add-ons to the original Spotify program) brings varied new ways to stream music from curated services through Pitchfork or Rolling Stone to Moodagent, which creates playlists for you based on a specific mood you’re searching for. Spotify also allows you to see what your friends are listening to, which allows you to form wonderful new bonds over good bands. On the other hand…

CONS: There’s always the risk of drunken browsing and accidentally letting everyone know you’ve been listening to Third Eye Blind’s gross pro-OWS single “If There Ever Was A Time.” I’ll never live that down. YOU, you won’t ever live that down. That’s what I meant. Songs are interrupted by ads, which can be a bit jarring, especially if you’re listening to an album that thrives on continuity, like “The Monitor.”

_______________________________________

PANDORA
PLANS: Free, Pandora One ($36/year)

WHAT YOU GET: We’ve all been there: prepping for a party, you’re too busy cleaning up your apartment to remember to make a truly rocking playlist. With the guests filtering in, you just decide to throw your iTunes library on shuffle and hope for the best. It works for a bit, until the little men in your computer pick a track off of “Final Fantasy IV: Celtic Moon” and you have to explain the merits of video game soundtracks to your guests, who are confused and possibly doubled over with laughter. Pandora can fix this, by finding like-minded artists automatically after you pick just one song, artist or genre. You can also play musical Gregor Mendel and do weird genetic experiments by grafting Sam Cooke, The Walkmen and Toby Keith to a playlist and seeing what comes up. If you upgrade to Pandora One, you can get ad-free listening and ditch the 12 skip-per-day limit.

PRO:  Discover music you’ve never heard of, without even trying.

CONS:  You have to be willing to cede control of the party rockin’ jams to creepy music science and it comes with a limited number of skips. It gets repetitive and  you don’t get an expanded library by paying up.

_______________________________________

RHAPSODY
PLAN: $10/month for unlimited music

WHAT YOU GET:The only streaming service that doesn’t offer a free option, Rhapsody has a library of 13 million songs, but they stay hidden behind a paywall.

PRO: They should be commended for being very upfront about being in it for the money.

CON: If your goal is to listen to streaming music as cheaply as possible, Rhapsody loses out.

_______________________________________

GROOVESHARK
PLANS: Free, Grooveshark Plus ($6/month or $60/year) and Grooveshark Anywhere ($9/month or $90 a year)

WHAT YOU GET: Grooveshark is like the anarchist of the music-streaming crowd. It should be commended for trying to push boundaries, but isn’t a realistic alternative to just pirating music. The five-year-old service doesn’t give a precise number of how many songs are in its library, but that’s mostly due to the fact that users can upload songs directly from their computers. Paying for Grooveshark Plus removes the ads and gives you access to a desktop client so you don’t need to go to the website to use it. Paying for Grooveshark Anywhere gets you unlimited access on a phone app. It can also assist you in puking your brains out: the site has a Power Hour-friendly feature that ends every song in your queue after 60 seconds. [1]

PROS: Good for just jumping in and streaming something you want without any hassle.

CONS: Allowing users to upload songs means the site suffers from a total lack of vetting. This is why searching for say, Catch-22’s “Alone in a Crowd”, will get you four separate results claiming to be the album but all of them are incomplete or out of order. Grooveshark is also collecting lawsuits like yuppies collect visors, so it has the best shot at suddenly blinking out of existence one day.

_______________________________________

RDIO
PLANS: Free, Web ($4.99/month), Unlimited ($9.99/month), Family Unlimited ($17.99 for two accounts, $22.99 for three)

WHAT YOU GET: Like Grooveshark, Rdio doesn’t require you to download a desktop application. Unlike Grooveshark, you have to register to use it, but at least you won’t have to deal with a nightmare of shit strewn everywhere, masquerading as a music library. Rdio puts a limit on how much music you can listen to for free, but unlike Spotify’s 10 hours per month, this one’s cloaked in mystery. Seriously. Rdio’s website offers no hard number on how many hours you can listen per month, but in an interview with Fast Company Spotify’s CEO said the service would be dynamic and dependent on how often a user took advantage of it. Rdio also offers the option to follow other users a la Twitter and let them curate your music choices. These “influencers” range from music magazines to record labels to regular schmucks that just amass a bunch of followers. So you’ve got yet another thing to work towards in the struggle for internet bragging rights.

PROS: No ads between songs. If you’re into paying for things, Rdio’s big advantage over Spotify is found in the Family Unlimited plan. It comes with a reduced price on two subscriptions or even a third, if you want to enjoy it without ever having to listen to Five Finger Death Punch or whatever your rotten kids are listening to.

CONS: The possibility of suddenly running out of free service. Relatively no-frills compared to Spotify.

_______________________________________

SO WHICH IS THE BEST, DAVE??? So we’re still left with the question of which service to use. Keeping in mind that there are artists not available on any of the services — The Beatles, Led Zeppelin and Metallica being the biggest names — until the services offer a cut deemed big enough, the respective libraries don’t differentiate themselves in any major way. As much as I hate to jump on a bandwagon (the reason I still won’t root for the Giants) I’d recommend Spotify as the top free service, ads and all. The Moodagent app alone makes it worth it since it takes the work out of making your just got laid/just got dumped playlist, which gives you more time celebrate/weep.

[1] Power Hour: a drinking game where one takes a shot of beer every minute for an hour

You can be a TaskRabbit like Chris M. -- or hire one.

Maybe you’ve heard about TaskRabbit, the web site where you can post small jobs for pre-screened helpers to bid on. We’ve written about them; I recently reviewed TaskRabbit for New York Magazine. Since it was a positive experience, I’m happy to pass along a tip that you can get $25 off your first task through 1/22 by entering SCOUTMOB at checkout. (The deal isn’t on the app.) Also, if you have a van / toolkit / mad Ikea assembly skills (a top NYC request) the service is still hiring rabbits, especially “handymen, house cleaners and those with ready access to easy transportation (cars)” says Jamie Viggiano, head of marketing for the company. You have to be pretty hardcore to eek out a living as a full-time rabbit, but a few of the part-timers I met were profitably supplementing day jobs with a few TR gigs a week.