• Tui Na: The massage therapist kneads, rolls and brushes areas between each of the joints and stimulates acupressure points. Acupressure points are the junctures of energy pathways in the body (combination of the words “acupuncture” and “pressure”).
• Qi Gong: A style of massage that places emphasis on breathing and movement exercises. Similar to Tui Na in that it makes use of applying pressure to certain points and rolling/grasping/kneading techniques.
• Thai Massage: The massage therapist uses their hands, knees, legs and feet to move one into a series of yoga-like stretches.

Keep in mind that at most of these places, no frills is the operating principle. Paper screens and curtains separating massage tables are standard fare, as well as tables lined with paper towels. But at the end of your work (or out-of-work) day, your shoulders are knot-free and your wallet’s only slightly lighter.

Sunshine Best Body Work, 4 Park Place at Fifth Ave., Park Slope
30-minute Tui-Na or Qi Gong massage/$35
60-minute massage/$60

LV13 Spa, 157 N. 5th St. between Bedford and Driggs, Williamsburg
30-minute Tui-Na or Qi Gong massage/$30
60-minute massage/$44

Tai Shuang Spring Resort, 820 54th St., between Eighth and Ninth Avenues, Borough Park
Thai style massage – 60 minutes (including choice of facial or oil treatment)/$25
Foot or upper body massage – 60 minutes/$28

Qi Gong Tui-Na Salon, 655 Manhattan Ave., between Bedford and Norman, Greenpoint
30 minute massage/ $26
60 minute massage/ $50

Summer Day Spa and Bodyworks, 351 Flatbush Ave. at Park Place, Park Slope
60-minute Tui-Na or Qi Gong massage/$48

Also worth looking into is Third Root Community Health Center. For you super-alterna Brokelynites out there, Third Root offers massages based on a sliding scale. With their handy worksheet, the community center calculates your monthly income by taking into account various costs such as number of dependents, child care, tuition, HIV and AIDS medications, etc. Then, with the final figure they determine the fee you’ll pay.

The Brooklyn Lyceum Holiday Craft Fair.

On the list of life’s pleasures, holiday shopping in your average mall ranks alongside going to the tow pound. But who doesn’t love a craft fair? Cupcakes, live music, onesies printed with curse words… There are so many to choose from this Festivus season that you can find a hand-quilted potholder for everyone on your list without ever leaving the BK. Aside from wading through the piles of beaded earrings and papaya-chocolate-cranberry scented soap, you can also gorge yourself on pie or learn how to make your own textiles. It’s a Christmas/Hannukah/Kwanzaa/non-denominational holiday miracle! And as always, if we missed your school, church or vegan commune’s annual shopfest, please let us know in the comments.

DECEMBER 4 & 5

Brooklyn Friends School Winter Craft Fair, 375 Pearl St., December 4 from 4pm-8pm and December 5 from 10:30 to 5
-Carnival rides, face painting, Guitar Hero competition
-80% of profits support Horizons at Brooklyn Friends

Holiday Gift Fair and Pie Social, PS29, 425 Henry St., December 5, 10 to 4
-Brooklyn shops Fork + Pencil and Half-Pint Citizens will donate proceeds of their sales to BK schools
-Craft workshops and film festival for children
-Pie Competition with judges from Food and Wine and Top Chef

DECEMBER 12 & 13

Task Trunk Holiday Sale, 100 N. 3^rd St., December 12 and 13, noon to 7
-Collaborative trunk show
-Cupcakes from Kumquat Cupcakery

3^rd Ward’s Handmade Holiday Craft Fair, 195 Morgan Ave., December 12, noon to 6
-Live music from Raya Brass Band and free coffee from Gimme!
-First 300 guests to arrive will receive free tote bags by local artist Fernanda Cohen full of vendor swag
-Free demos and workshops including Making Old Jewelry New and How to Make Your Own Textiles

Brooklyn Indie Market, Smith & Union St., December 12 and 13, 11-7
-Designers donate 10-15% of sales to benefit Brooklyn Community Housing and service

Bull and Bear Market, Invisible Dog, 51 Bergen St., December 13^th, starts at noon
-2 people dressed as the stock market’s Bull and Bear will compete in games
-Check out the Recession Art Benefit dinner at 6 PM: $28 in advance, $30 at door covers dinner, booze, and  the Bull and Bear games

NY Creates Craft Fair, Brooklyn Historical Society, 128 Pierrepont St., at Clinton, December 11 to 16, weekdays 11 to 7, weekends 12 to 5
-ceramics, jewelry, apparel, plush toys, organic cosmetics, glass works, photo art to home goods – all at affordable prices

DECEMBER 19 & 20

Brooklyn Lyceum Holiday Craft Market, 227 4^th Ave., December 19 and 20, 11-7
- 60 + local vendors including food by Luscious Brooklyn, Mogador Falafels, and Brooklyn Brine

Shiny Squirrel and It’s Ok my Dear Shopping Event,  246 Grand St., December 19 and 20
-Cupcakes, drinks, music

ONGOING
Winter Holiday Emporium, Hands on World, 132 4^th Pl., Saturdays 10am-3pm and Sundays 9am-12pm til December 20
-Supporting debut of Class Ceiling, Massilia Home and Garden, Amini Jewelry

John Munnelly sings the blues.

“I was laid off last week, don’t know what I will do, I’m gonna go online with the unemployment blues…” Sound familiar? If so, at least be comforted by the fact that you’re in the good company of fellow Brooklynite and singer/songwriter John Munnelly. Bensonhurst-by-way-of-Ireland musician Munnelly recently won the American Society of Composers, Authors and Publishers Foundation’s Jay Gorney Award for his recession-era lament “The Unemployment Blues.” Written in a contemporary “Brother, Can You Spare a Dime” vein, the song touches on all your standard laid-off woes: sending out 346 bajillion resumes to no avail, college degree with nothing to show for it, and of course, food stamps.

For Munnelly, the inspiration for “The Unemployment Blues” came from his co-writer Christina Lord’s layoff rather than his own. The pair penned the ditty at a monthly songwriting meeting and the rest is prize-winning history. According to their website, ASCAP doles out $1,000 to an ASCAP member or unaffiliated songwriter who crafts an original song with a message of social conscience and/or social significance. What better time than the biggest economic slump since the 1930s to get such inspiration?

“Brother, Can You Spare a Dime” was Jay Gorney’s most successful song and Bing Crosby’s recording of it was one of the best-selling records of 1932. Munnelly recognizes that songwriting is not “the obvious place to go to make money,” and though the music biz can be slim pickings he still sticks it out for the love of it. So spare some of your own dimes and check out John Munnelly’s set at the Duplex Songwriters Night at the Duplex Cabaret Theatre (61 Christopher St. @ Seventh Ave., Greenwich Village).

Photo by Christina Lord.

Robbers on High Street, tonight at Bell House.

We’ve established that CMJ is great, but what’s even greater than cheap indie rock shows? Free indie rock shows with free booze, of course. You can thank Gothamist and Brooklyn Based for making your inebriate dreams come true. Tonight at 5 p.m, “CMJ on the Gowanus” kicks off at our favorite Super Fund-area watering hole, the Bell House (149 7th St.). A bunch of buzzworthy bands including Robbers on High Street, Pomegranates, and Small Black will take the stage as you swill down free Triple 8 Vodka. Alcohol aside, there will also be chow provided by Red Hook ball field vendors, Asia Dog, and Van Leeuwen Ice Cream. Just remember: the vodka’s free til it runs out, so jump on it. Check here for the full band line-up.

But we’re not gonna make it that easy for you. Over at the Glasslands Gallery (289 Kent Ave.) in Williamsburg, Death + Taxes Magazine presents a free Japandroids and Real Estate show. Drinks are courtesy of Colt 45 and doors are at 8 p.m. The choice is yours: vodka or malt liquor. We won’t judge. In other free CMJ show news, tomorrow night at 9, the zero-cover-charge lineup at Zebulon (258 Wythe Ave.) features Superhuman Happiness, Choo Choo La Rouge, The Rocco John Group. Finally, Friday night at 11:45 p.m., Harlem and The Dutchess & the Duke play Public Assembly (70 N. 6th Street), also pro bono.

Hollerado, Thursday night at Union Pool.

You can finally sleep without flipping the pillow to get the cool side, pumpkin ale is in abundance, and all those pesky frat boys are back in town. Yes, fall is in full force and you know what that means? Besides  exorbitant gas bills, the CMJ Music Marathon!!! College Music Journal brings its annual weeklong band showcase to your neck of the woods for low, low prices. We browsed through the show list and picked out the best and brightest Brooklyn shows we think are worth your precious time.

Willowz, Wednesday, Oct. 21, 8 p.m. Trash (256 Grand St.) price tba
If you’ve seen Michel Gondry’s The Science of Sleep, then you’re probably familiar with the Willowz’ funky/punky garage rock sounds. If not, high tail it to Trash on Wednesday. This band may actually make you wanna uncross your plaid-clad arms.

Hollerado, Thursday, Oct. 22,  8 p.m., Union Pool (484 Union Ave.) price tba
Contrary to what you might assume, Hollerado are not in fact from Colorado. Instead they hail from that country we love to hate and hate to love: Canada. All jokes aside, this act dishes out power pop that even Jack White can get behind. Mr. White himself chose them to open for his zillionth new band. Incentive? I think yes.

Japandroids, Friday, Oct. 23,  7 p.m. Bell House (149 7th St.) $12
Hollerado’s Canadian comrades take on Gowanus this Friday at the Bell House. Citing their influences as the Sonics and “your sister,” Japandroids are two dudes that play infectious fuzz rock. Self-described “sweethearts still naïve enough to think they’ll never sell out,” Brian, Dave, and your sister are worth checking out.

EAR PWR, Saturday, Oct. 24, 11 PM, Cameo Gallery (93 N 6th St.) price tba
Guaranteed EAR PWR will make even the most cynical scenester bust a move. Or not.  But they’ll at least make you tap your feet to the electro pop beats and the distorted shouts coming from the duo’s megaphone. Living proof that tobacco and OBX car stickers ain’t the only thing North Carolina’s got going for it.

An Albatross, Sunday, Oct. 25, 12:30 AM Union Pool (484 Union Ave.) $10
An Albatross will make you feel like you’ve died and descended into the Seventh Circle of Hell. In an awesome way.  The  PA noise rock band is known for their out of control live shows and with an EP entitled Eat Thunder, Shit Lightning. How can you not be intrigued?

See Das Racist, instead of Snoop Dogg.

Here’s a common predicament: you’ve exhausted the number of times you can listen to “Africa” by Toto on your Hall and Oates Pandora station. Or maybe that’s just me.

Whatever the case, you’re in dire need of a musical metamorphosis. This may come as a shock, but in Brooklyn a new band plays about as often as you want to punch the G train. But who can keep track of them all? That’s why we put together this broke-ass-friendly fall band swap—to introduce you to some of the noteworthy new and not-so-new acts playing around Brooklyn (and one in Manhattan) this fall, by likening them to big names you already know and probably can’t afford.

Lo-Fi Synthy Post-Punk Band Swap

The Name Brand: Echo and the Bunnymen at Hammerstein Ballroom, November 22, $46.50

The Budget Band: Silk Flowers with Former Ghosts at Monkey Town (58 N. 3rd St.), October 13, $12

Problem: You’re fiendin’ for some 24 Hour Party People-esque, gloomy synth-rock but don’t exactly have 50 bones to shell out to see Echo and his 50-year-old bunny-bros. Solution: Silk Flowers brings both the gloom and the synth doom and you’ll still be able to afford some Schlitz to assuage your authentic hipster heartaches.

Self-Aware Ironic Hip-Hop Swap

The Name Brand: Snoop Dogg at Nokia Theatre Times Square, October 29, $49.99

The Budget Band: Das Racist at Public Assembly (70 N. 6th St.), October 23, $5

Okay, so Snoop Dogg probably isn’t the most self-aware, ironic rapper but Das Racist have that shtick on lockdown. The BK duo’s break-out jam “Pizza Hut Taco Bell” has been all over the blogosphere, so check it out if you haven’t already. And while you’re at it, listen to “One Dollar Can,” an ode to Arizona Iced Tea. Now that’s Brokelyn savvy.

Fan-Folking-Tastic Band Swap

The Name Brand: Monsters of Folk at United Palace Theatre, November 6, $40.50

The Budget Band: Miles Benjamin Anthony Robinson at Knitting Factory Brooklyn (361 Metropolitan Ave.), October 22, price tba

Instead of having to suffer both Conor Oberst’s voice and a huge dent in your wallet, head on over to Billyburg and hit up Dude with the Longest Name ’09. Mr. Robinson’s sound has been compared to both Bob Dylan and David Bowie and there’s a hint of Bon Iver in some of that warbling as well.

Alt-Country Songstress Band Swap

The Name Brand: Neko Case at the Wellmont Theatre, November 15, $32

The Budget Band: Laura Cantrell at 92YTribeca (200 Hudson St., Manhattan), November 14, $15

Ms. Cantrell has a pretty enviable resume: Influential UK DJ John Peel described her 2000 LP “Not the Tremblin’ Kind” as one of his favorite albums of the last ten years and possibly his life, so take that into consideration when you’re bitching and moaning about the trek to Manhattan. Plus, she covers New Order’s classic “Love Vigilantes.”

Metalocalypse Band Swap

The Name Brand: Metallica at Madison Square Garden, November 15, $54

The Budget Band: Krallice at Union Pool (484 Union Ave. #A), November 13, price tba

Um, so black metal comes from Norway and not Africa and that’s where my knowledge of the genre begins and ends, so here goes… Krallice has been compared to black metal progenitors such as Gorgoroth and Burzum, whose sole member did time for the murder of another metal guitarist and the arson of several churches. If that’s not cred enough to make you forgo Lars “I Hate File Sharing” Ulrich, I don’t know what is.

Photo by Juan Hernandez

Yeah, yeah, we’ve heard it all before. Park Slope is full of strollers, free-spirited moms, and crunchy co-op people. It’s also full of snazzy places to get your happy hour booze on; particularly on the Fifth Avenue corridor between Flatbush Avenue and 3rd Street. We did the dirty work and checked out every dive bar, gastropub, and basically any place with a roof and four walls that looked like it sold alcohol on the aforementioned stretch. So read on, dear cynical reader, and start planning your very own Fifth Avenue pub crawl. Make sure to check out the meal deals at Long Tan and the $5 fresh juice margaritas at Lobo.

O’Connor’s Bar
39 Fifth Ave., (718) 783-9721
Thursday 5-2am
$1 off all drinks

Alchemy
56 5th Ave., (718) 636-4385
M-F 4:30-6:30
2 for 1 local beers and well drinks
$5 plates with purchase of drink (including fried clams, BBQ’d spare ribs, spicy chicken wings)

Peperoncino
72 5th Ave., (718) 638-4760
5-11 daily
$5 mojitos, margaritas, caipirinha

Al Di La Trattoria
248 5th Ave
(718) 636-8888
5-11 daily at the bar
$1 dollar off bottled beer, $4 sangria and well drinks, $3 drafts, and $4.95 for a slice of pizza and a beer.

Voodoo Sports Lounge
138 Fifth Ave.,  (718) 399-3206
M-Sa 5-8 PM
Specials vary daily

Los Pollitos II
148 Fifth Ave., (718) 623-9152
11:30-7 daily
$4.50 regular margaritas, sangria, beer, wine

The VSpot Cafe
156 Fifth Ave., (718) 622-2275
T-Fri 5-8
2 for 1 beer and wine

Photo courtesy of Bogota bistro.

Bogota Bistro
141 Fifth Ave., (718) 230-3805
MWThu 5-11
Fri-Sat 5-6, 12AM -1AM
Sat-Sun 12 noon-4PM (brunch)
$5 classic mojitos/$6 fruit mojitos
$6 caipirinhas/ $7 fruit caipirinhas
$5 margaritas/ $6 fruit margaritas
$5 frozen margaritas/ $6 frozen fruit margaritas
$5 sangria/$6 brazil sangria
$4 beer

Nana Restaurant and Bar
155 Fifth Ave., (718) 230-3749
5-8 daily
$3 beer, $4 wine, $5 cocktails, $6 daily speciality
$3 bar menu with purchase of any drink (including seaweed salad, spicy ravioli, and scallion pancakes)

Patio Lounge
179 Fifth Ave., (718) 857-3477
5-8 daily
$1 off all drinks, $10 small pitcher of sangria, $20 large pitcher of sangria, daily drink specials

Lobo
188 Fifth Ave., (718) 636-8886
Daily until 5 and all night at bar
$5 fresh juice margaritas

Long Tan Restaurant
194 Fifth Ave., (718) 622-8444
5:30 PM- 7PM, 12 -2 AM daily
$3 Saratoga lager
$1 off all drinks
Discounted bar menu with purchase of any drink (including $10 steak, $5 pad thai, and $5 chicken satay)

200 Fifth
200 Fifth Ave., (718) 638-2925
Mon-Thurs 4-7
Fri- 11- 7
$3.50 pint specials
$6, $7, $8 wine specials

Playa
230 Fifth Ave., (718) 399-2161
Crazy Quesadilla Wednesday, 5:30-10
$19.95 unlimited quesadillas and sangria

The Great Lakes Bar
285 Fifth Ave., (718) 499-3710
M-F 5-8
$1 off all drinks

Loki Lounge, photo by Jennie Clutter.

Loki Lounge
304 Fifth Ave., (718) 965-9600
M-F 3-7PM
$3 drafts
$2 buds and millers

Aperitivo
279 Fifth Ave., (718) 369-1123
M-F 4-7PM
½ off PBR
$2 off wine, beer, cocktails

Press 195
195 Fifth Ave., (718) 857-1950
M-F 4-7 PM
Draft beer $3.50
Sangria $3.50

Mezcal’s Mexican Restaurant
396 Fifth Ave., (718) 965-6050
M-F 3-6 PM
$5 Margaritas, sangria, tequila sunrise, pina colada
$4 beer

High Dive
243 Fifth Ave., (718) 788-0401
2-8 daily
$2 High Life, $1 off all drinks
Free popcorn all the time!

Photo courtesy of High Dive bar.